Relationships

Damned by the ‘blessers’
It once used to be that the word blessed, along with its derivatives, had hallowed connotations. Not entirely so these days, especially in black urban circles where “blessers”
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DearBear1
Dear Bear: My partner makes no money. Is that a problem?
Dear Bear, I've been with my partner for five years, and I want to spend many more together. We both hate capitalism. He grew up extremely poor and
loss
Being robbed is the price we pay for the way we live
"Being robbed is the price we pay for the way we live," my husband said, several hours after we came home on Saturday to find our front gate
AFP
Is a woman too old to have a baby at 50? It depends on who she is
August 24, 2015
Woman has baby. You wouldn’t think that it would make headline news (unless, of course, it was Kate and Will again), but it has. Not because the mother-to-be ...read more
AFP
Tinder is not to blame – dating has always been horrific and weird
August 13, 2015
“God,” sighs Marie (Carrie Fisher), having just listened to her best friend’s latest dating nightmare in my very favourite scene in one of my very favourite movies, When ...read more
AFP
How to survive the dating apocalypse
August 12, 2015
Here’s how it goes. Every few months, a 4 000-word trend piece comes along that captures some elemental cultural truth and with it the imagination of the internet, ...read more
AFP
Why aren’t men in their 30s pressured to have kids? The answer isn’t biological…
June 3, 2015
Here is an assertion with which you will be familiar. After 30, women’s fertility falls drastically. Their chances of conceiving naturally plummet, and they are left relying on ...read more
Gallo
My two years as a ‘kept wife’ taught me how much my independence is worth
May 20, 2015
The New York Times recently published a piece about the lives of the hyper-rich stay-at-home women on the Upper East Side, complete with sex-segregated dinner parties and year-end ...read more
M&G
A fist and a hard place
April 22, 2015
Phumla Ndlovu’s* partner Xolile Silo* started drinking at nine that Monday morning. He then left their house in Roodepan township, near Kimberley in the Northern Cape, and headed ...read more
Screengrab
Why do we still have to justify the choice to be child-free?
April 9, 2015
They’re emotionally and physically exhausting, they’re hugely expensive and they are the biggest curtailment of your personal freedom after prison: objectively, it makes next to no sense to ...read more
freeimages.com
‘Another broken home’
April 8, 2015
I bristled again the other day at a phrase I think we need to expunge from our vocabularies. I was talking to an elderly relative about a mutual ...read more
M&G
How I became a Muslim bride
April 2, 2015
With henna on my hands and my head covered in a scarf, I went to my wedding. My sister-in-law had helped me drape my purple and gold punjabi ...read more
Reuters
Explode, but only if you feel it
March 25, 2015
Faking orgasms is a disservice to society. Why give a standing ovation when the play is bad? These were the musings during my first year of university when ...read more
Kaizer
Take him out, make him feel pretty
March 3, 2015
"Men don’t court anymore." A complaint I've heard more than once, men are less R&B and more hip hop, less Luther Vandross Buy Me a Rose and more ...read more
Reuters
Good sex irons out the wrinkles
February 27, 2015
Sexy old women: mutually exclusive terms, some would say, unless you’re referring to “cougars”, whose legendary prowling gives them their beastly nickname. This species is female, middle-aged and ...read more